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Though man is a social creature,
Fear causes him to hide from the world,
Some dream of Harry Potter’s cloak of invisibility,
While others wish for Mr. India’s invisible watch.
Social anxiety is the reason behind it. Around 300 million people have experienced a social anxiety attack in their lives. The COVID-19 pandemic triggered a 25% increase in the prevalence of anxiety and depression worldwide.
Have you ever wondered, “Can you self-diagnose social anxiety?” If you're often overwhelmed in social settings or feel fear of being judged, you might relate to the symptoms of anxiety.
The blog discusses social anxiety, meaning, causes, symptoms, and real-life treatment.
What is Social Anxiety?
Social anxiety or social phobia is more than shyness or occasional nerves. It involves intense fear of certain social situations, especially when one is likely to be evaluated by others. When the intensity of anxiety increases and the person feels the social anxiety disorder symptoms for more than 6 months, then it becomes social anxiety disorder.
Social anxiety is the fear of being rejected. When socially anxious people become overly conscious of how they appear to others, they don’t want to be dismissed because rejection leads to isolation, which implies physical danger to the brain. Because of this, the brain treats social rejection as a threat, activating the same fear and pain systems used for physical danger.
The anticipation of rejection leads to social anxiety disorder (SAD). The fear of rejection and social anxiety are the brain's signals to avoid isolation, which it perceives as dangerous.
Do Social Anxious People Love Being Alone?
No!
They want healthy and fruitful relationships. They are happier with people than when they are alone. They are not devoid of the basic desire for human connection; it's just that they have trouble attaining it with different people and in certain situations. They feel held back by their fears as they avoid the stress of social interactions. They might not know how to navigate social complexities, which gives them a fear of missing out.
Social Anxiety Disorder Causes
The intense fear of rejection and the fear of getting isolated from the world is the root cause of social anxiety. . Rejection causes us to go backwards and can accelerate the self-defeat thought patterns. The causes of social anxiety may vary.
A socially anxious student may turn down a position like prefect despite being a great candidate for the role. For a student, social anxiety may feel like the following-
- Being called on in a class is a nightmare
- Self-isolating from fun activities
- Obsessing over something you said
- Feeling sick before presentations
A socially anxious employee may suppress that inner voice in the meeting and refrain from pitching a revolutionary idea.
- Meeting new people
- Making small talk
- Talking on the phone
- Using public restrooms
- Being watched while doing something
- Talking with “important people”
Social anxiety gets so deep that people construct their lives around “avoiding rejection.”
Symptoms of Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD)
Intense fear or worry about being judged, embarrassed, or humiliated in social situations can be seen in the overall behaviour of someone suffering from SAD.
Emotional signs and symptoms of social anxiety disorder
- Excessive anxiety in everyday situations
- Extreme self-consciousness in small tasks
- Worrying about social gatherings days, weeks and months in advance
- Tend to avoid people at any cost
- Extreme fear of being judged or watched by strangers
- Fear of acting in a weird or humiliating way
- Fear of being labelled as the ‘nervous head’
Physical signs and symptoms
- Trembling or shaking
- Racing heart
- Tightness in the chest
- Sweating or hot flashes
- Feeling dizzy or faint
- Red face, or blushing
- Shortness of breath
- Upset stomach, nausea (i.e. butterflies)
Behavioural signs and symptoms
- Avoiding social situations that interfere with your life
- Staying silent to avoid attention or embarrassment
- Always needing a companion for social outings
- Drinking to calm nerves before social events
Social Anxiety Disorder vs Shyness
Social Anxiety Disorder is an intense fear of rejection or being judged, while shyness is a mild feeling of self-consciousness or discomfort. Read more below-
| Aspect | Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD) | Shyness |
|---|---|---|
| Severity | Intense, disrupts relationships, work, and daily life | Mild, manageable discomfort in social settings |
| Duration | Long-lasting, often for months or years | Temporary, fades with familiarity |
| Impact on Life | Avoids social situations, affects career, and relationships | Doesn't significantly interfere with daily life |
| Physical Symptoms | Sweating, shaking, rapid heartbeat, dizziness, nausea | Some nervousness, but no intense physical reactions |
| Emotional Experience | Overwhelming fear of judgment, humiliation, or rejection | Mild discomfort or self-consciousness |
| Response to Social Situations | Avoids or withdraws, has difficulty engaging or interacting | Feels awkward, but can engage once comfortable |
Social Anxiety Disorder Treatment
It is a tough time to have social anxiety. Stop letting social anxiety control you. Now is the time to address it. Social anxiety looks different in different people. Some might be too awkward in huge social situations, while others avoid intense one-on-one conversations. Severe social anxiety can make one feel that their only purpose is to go unnoticed, remain unseen and unheard.
Do Nothing
You want to be at ease with people. Set other people at ease. Stop thinking about how they would feel in a new social situation, but attend to it to make the person you are talking to comfortable. As soon as they watched them, they were no longer afraid of them.
Know Yourself Better
Dr Mitesh: Complete this sentence, “I'm afraid to meet people because people will think I am—-?”
Ravi: Weird
Dr Mitesh: Let’s pretend that it is true. What’s difficult about that?
Ravi: No one would like to be around me.
Dr Mitesh: Means you will be rejected. Then what's next?
Ravi: I will be alone.
Dr Mitesh: Nothing to worry. This fear can be overcome with practice. Just learn how to stay connected with people when you feel weird and are worried about being rejected.
Ravi: How to do that?
Dr Mitesh: Exposure Therapy means intentionally putting yourself in weird situations, experiencing that anxiety in a healthy way, maintaining eye contact, getting feedback, and doing that whole process in other situations.
Check and Change Your Thoughts
How to stop social anxiety?
With practice, you would come to know which thoughts trigger social anxiety disorder. We need to learn our thought patterns because they can make or break us. A series of thoughts controls our whole life. A socially anxious person has a set of thoughts that make them nervous in front of another person. If those thoughts can be transformed, the root cause can be treated. Take a look at how-
| Old Thought Pattern | Reframed Thought |
|---|---|
| “Everyone's looking at me. They know I'm anxious." | “People are busy in themselves, not me. It is okay to be anxious.” |
| "I sounded so fake" | “I tried better than last time. I was trying to connect and did it with all my heart.” |
| “Did that come out weird? I shouldn’t have said that.” | “Even if I said something awkward, it’s okay. I am learning, and perfection is a myth.” |
| “I shouldn’t have gone. I made a fool of myself.” | “Going out to meet people and interact with them was a step forward. Keep it up.” |
| "I’ll never be good at this." | “I am in a better position today than yesterday. I will learn with time.” |
| “I can’t even speak a word, even on a phone call.” | “Being nervous over a call is fine. I am a human, too. I can take my time thinking and handle it one step at a time.” |
Social Anxiety Disorder is Not Harmless
We are now the most connected ever in human history, yet the most stressed and socially anxious. People now feel more isolated and stressed, largely due to social anxiety. People with the condition have faced issues in all aspects of their lives.
- Running everyday errands: Simple tasks like making phone calls and ordering food at a restaurant can be overwhelming due to the fear of being judged or making mistakes.
- Interacting with family members: The fear of rejection can be so deep-rooted that it can make you uncomfortable even around your family members.
- Fail at Job Interviews: The pressure to make a good impression, speak confidently, and interact smoothly can drive a socially anxious person mad.
Read More: How does Stress Impact on Your Physical and Mental Wellness?
No one should feel alone in their mental health journey. With the right resources, treatment, and support like insurance, you can take meaningful steps toward managing social anxiety and improving your quality of life. Many health insurance plans now offer coverage for mental health services, including therapy, medication, counselling and e-consultations. Your mental well-being is worth investing in.
Symptoms can be managed and reversed with loving support and care. One can learn to thrive in social events again with patience and resources.
Disclaimer: The above information is for reference purposes only. Kindly consult your general physician for verified medical advice. The health insurance benefits are subject to policy terms and conditions. Refer to your policy documents for more information.
